MOVIES: "THINK LIKE A MAN"

When I read comedian Steve Harvey’s serious book: “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man,” my first thought was: “Wow! He’s breaking the code of silence! Men must think he’s a traitor—telling the ladies all the guy secrets!” (The book came about as a sincere effort on Harvey’s part to genuinely help clueless women in bad relationships with men.) The premise of the movie: When a group of guy-friends realize that the women in their lives are using the book to “change the game” and get what they want from the relationship, the men decide to use the same book to make the women THINK they are getting what they want.  But, as the voiceover says: “The only problem with PRETENDING to step up? You may find that you actually HAVE to step up.”

Harvey’s main point to women is that men are inherently lazy, or rather, that they’ll take the easy way out whenever given it. (The “player” character admits he prefers women with “no standards.”) Women need to raise the bar. Women need to require men to do certain things and take certain steps in the relationship. The book itself is brilliant, exceedingly helpful, and is quoted all through the movie. The movie also includes snippets of Harvey himself on a fake talk show giving pointers. However, one unfortunate guideline in the book is “The 90-Day Rule,” that is, women should make men wait 90 days for sex, and then it’s OK. (Harvey has no problem with pre-marital sex.) Of course, this is a longer waiting period than many, many “couples” utilize, so at least it’s getting people thinking about the value of waiting at all.

DISCLAIMER: Some feedback I got on this review said I wasn't clear enough about the wrongness of sex outside marriage. I do not believe in sex outside marriage in any form. Sex speaks the language of "you alone forever." Sex outside marriage is a kind of a lie spoken with the body. It is damaging and destructive. Sexual love is FUNDAMENTAL, FREE, FAITHFUL (marriage), FULL AND FRUITFUL.

Actually, the more I think about it, Harvey undoes and undermines all his good info and good advice (book & film) with his stance on pre-marital sex! Eeeeeek! 

Sex IS marriage and marriage IS sex. Don't believe me? If you don't have sex, is your marriage consummated? I rest my case. If you still don't believe me, just listen to Cameron Diaz:

The film good-naturedly calls love a “battlefield” and accuses the ladies of starting the “war.” Guy “types” (player, Mama’s boy, dreamer, non-committer, happily-married man, miserably divorced man who thinks he’s happy) are pitted against gal “types” (powerful CEO that can’t find her equal, the one-night stand woman, the woman in the live-in relationship whose partner is too comfortable and is not proposing, the single Mom who can’t find a guy who likes kids). These are, of course, extremely realistic  and common situations.

The conclusion of the film is a kind of a win-win for both “sides.” It’s true that men are leaders in so many ways, but women must also exert their feminine power to help shape overgrown boys into real men, NOT to emasculate them, but to call them to true manhood! The guys may rise to the occasion kicking and screaming, but as Harvey says at the end of his book: down deep, men really want to be the real men that women want.

OTHER STUFF:

--Theology of the Body? Except for the premarital sex...HECK, YEAH!

--The screenwriters are men. It feels like there was a woman’s touch in there, but it might simply be that Steve Harvey really LISTENED so well to his female callers-in to his radio show (the inspiration for his book) that he is now an expert on “what women want.”

--The movie highlights my FAVORITE parts of the book!

--Sad-but-true, watch-and-weep, super-short comedic cartoon “history of men” at beginning of film. THEN: Cavemen=difficult rituals to become a man. NOW: Modern men=internet porn.

--Funny black guy/white guy humor.

--Some politically incorrect gay jokes. Interesting.

--VERY slight overtone of kids being a “problem.”

--Excellent character and plot development. Especially for an ensemble piece.

--The basketball scene could've been funnier. That includes the outtakes at the end, too.

--This film is FILLED with lots and lots of banter. Guys really talking stuff out with each other (and gals, too, of course) in their guy way. The audience in my theater (young adults) were glued to the long dialogue parts. It felt like they were trying to catch some wisdom.

--Hardcover books, Barnes & Nobles, and Oprah felt old.

--The live-in female partner is treated like “one of the guys”!

--The happily-married man…really is!

--The high-powered CEO gal calling Harvey’s book “sexist” proves to be just so flimsy. Men and women ARE different. Very different.

--Lots of sex talk, but it’s somehow sweet and, ultimately PERSONAL, not IMPERSONAL, and ultimately HUMANIZING, not DEHUMANIZING.

--Men also expect a lot from women. “It’s 2012. She can open my door for me!” Even sadder commentary: “Women will put up with anything once they’re into you.” Actually, it’s even sadder than that. Women LOVE. And sometimes they love very badly and put up with all kinds of things when they should be loving themselves, too, and should either be changing the situation or getting out of it.

--There is a faint underlying Christian element in the film. One couple briefly pauses (before having passionate sex on a first date) because they’re “Christian.” At LEAST we see that religion matters and has something to say here.

--I have come to believe there’s nothing more beautiful than a Dad. (Actually saw two happy fathers—without Moms--bringing their 3 kids each into the cinema—but not for THIS movie! It was just such a beautiful sight.) Especially nowadays. Because they don’t have to be. Society today does not push men in that direction at all. And they can always impregnate and take off—as it has always been, but now that is totally socially acceptable. Dads aren’t necessarily respected by other men (but they get BIG props from women!)--and in popular media, fatherhood is portrayed mostly as EMASCULATING and a DRAG—when fecundity used to be (and actually IS) the epitome of masculinity!

--Men lie to women. Men won’t lie to other men, but they’ll lie to women. Or at least some will. Just one more double standard. Women, perhaps, manipulate, but are we as much outright liars as men are? I don’t think so. Unless we’re just imitating bad men once again.

--The male/female differences are captured sooooo well in this film. So true to life. And there’s plenty of defects on both sides.

--Sad notes that somehow feel light: stripper culture, STD jokes, condoms.

--Men can’t become fulfilled if “all they want is sex.” Men can’t become fulfilled without becoming “real men” WITH “real women.” Men just THINK all they want is sex. Men just think they want to be “free.”

--Most honest comment which is actually a good thing and the way God made us:
Zeke to Maya: “OK. I DO want the sex. And YOU.”

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:) :) :) :) :) :)

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"LET NO MAN PUT ASUNDER" MT 19:6

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MOVIES: "THE HUNGER GAMES"

“The Hunger Games” books-to-movies juggernaut has captured the imaginations of young people and adults alike. It’s been said that writers of young adult literature are the true risk-takers and innovators today, creating believable, daring and intriguing new worlds and characters. (Full disclosure: I have not read the books, so this movie review will not be a comparison.)

“The Hunger Games” is set in a way-beyond-dystopian future in which the rulers living in the Third-Reich-like “Capitol” keep the peons in the “Districts” in fear and subjugation by holding gladiatorial games each year. The combatants are children and teenagers, picked at random to fight to the death, each representing their District. This shocking and unusual premise keeps its promise and delivers all kinds of unusual twists, which are at the same time familiar to us because—everything is televised. Like a gruesome reality show.

Katniss Everdeen (the flawless Jennifer Lawrence) volunteers to take the place of her little sister when her little sister’s name is drawn. A young man, Peeta (Josh Hutcherson), who has a crush on Katniss, is also chosen from her District. Out of twenty-four contestants, there is only one victor. We follow Katniss through her Hitler Youth-like “show no mercy” training and prepping in fighting and survival (which includes a stylist, played by Lenny Kravitz, because Katniss will need “sponsors”). The mechanics of fame are clearly delineated for the young combatants as they are packaged and presented to the public. All of this does not come naturally to the honest, unvarnished Katniss. When the games begin, alliances are made to stay alive. Some are genuine and others’ only self-serving.

“The Hunger Games” books are written by a woman, Suzanne Collins, and she gives us a strong female heroine in a cruel and violent world (although some of the other young people are also kind). Katniss never loses her humanity through it all, and never initiates the killing. Instead, she tries to flee it, and help her friends at her own peril. My one beef with the film is that Katniss has no character flaws. None. She is perfectly noble at all times. Even her weaknesses are her strengths (pluckiness, her inability to be anything but herself and play-act, etc.). It’s true that some people in real life are like this, but it makes them less relatable/imitable on screen, and it’s just one of those cardinal rules of storytelling/screenwriting: the main character has to have at least one flaw!

“The Hunger Games” is a story of veracity and self-sacrificial love in the face of power, control, image and spin. It is sharp social commentary on the very military-business-elite-media complex system that surrounds us more and more. The Games are schadenfreude, others’ misfortune as entertainment. Entertainment as control and distraction for the benefit of the few. There are potent ideas to chew on: “Not everyone likes the underdog.” “We don’t always have the luxury of being heroes and rebels if we are responsible for others.” “A little hope keeps the status quo—too much hope can foment rebellion/revolution/resistance.” “Hope is the only thing stronger than fear. Contain the hope.” “What if no one watched the Games?” (This last idea reminded me of the 60’s expression: “What if they held a war and no one came?”)

The young cast is fabulous, but so is the star-studded adult cast, and they work together like a well-oiled machine. Woody Harrelson plays Katniss’ and Peeta’s mentor. Elizabeth Banks is a Capitol operative that needs a visit from the fashion police. Wes Bentley is the TV producer of the games. Donald Sutherland is President Snow, and Stanley Tucci is simply at his best as the effervescent, toothy, blue-ponytailed host and commentator of the games.

President Snow is clearly in iron-fisted charge as a kind of Wizard of Oz-like social engineer. And the ending—showing him dissatisfied with the outcome of the Hunger Games—segues us to “Catching Fire,” the pending sequel (#2 in the trilogy).

One of the big questions surrounding “The Hunger Games” has been: Is it too violent for children? Especially since this is kids killing kids? I would say: know your kids, and at what age YOU think they can handle this. A fascinating article appeared in the Chicago Tribune citing a Hollywood script doctor turned pediatrician (yes, you read that right). The article talks about the difference between violence in print (the imagination protects the child) and violence on the screen (the imagining is done FOR the child). Another point brought up in the article is that when the aftermath of killing, maiming and violence is NOT seen, this can be more desensitizing than when it is. (There is not much aftermath in “The Hunger Games.” Most injuries and death are swift and the camera swoops away.) http://www.chicagotribune.com/entertainment/ct-ent-0321-violence-hunger-games-20120321,0,4551798.story

The question I would ask is: Why do we need/want to see this at all? I realized halfway through the film that I was actually watching a show within a show. What makes ME essentially different from all the people in the Districts and the Capitol who are watching this AS ENTERTAINMENT? Why do we find this entertaining and not repulsing? Is it simply: “I like to put myself in that situation and wonder what I would do?” “I like to see the good win out over evil?” (Good is firmly portrayed as good and evil as evil.) Am I desensitizing/preparing myself to accept a possibly more vicious future in reality by allowing myself to imagine one? Of course, World War II (or any real war) is far more hellish than this film. I couldn’t help thinking of the Jewish children of the Warsaw ghetto who were shot on sight--for sport--by Nazi soldiers.

The film is extremely well done on all counts. Once you know what you (and your children) are in for at the cinema, it’s your call.

OTHER STUFF:

--Jennifer Lawrence (who is 22 but looks like a teen) has an incredible ability to project innocence, resentment, simplicity, fear, anger. In an interview with “Rolling Stone” magazine, it was said of her (by those responsible for casting her)—they had never seen such reserves of emotion in an actress before. Lawrence already played a “girl surviving in the woods” in the small but acclaimed film “Winter’s Bone.” Evidently, in real life, she’s a tomboy from Kentucky with a wild streak.

--From the moment Katniss rises up on the pedestal in the middle of the wilderness to kill or be killed, we feel what war really is: an arena for mayhem and slaughter—with very few rules. She is now fair game. She is now meat.

--The movie is 142 minutes (and feels a bit long), and there were a few lulls in the rivetingness.

--The soundtrack is subtle and invisible (a good thing).

--Jennifer Lawrence has this incredible ability to put a look of "unknowingness" in her eyes.

--Katniss—although she never articulates it--would rather die with her humanity intact. She is trying mightily to win and preserve her life, but she won’t stoop to treachery or cruelty to do it. “Better to suffer for doing good than for doing evil” –1 Peter 3:17.

--The set design is sheer eye candy, from the Appalachian-like hills and woods, the miners’ drab homes, 1930’s plain Depression-era dresses; to the contrasting, garish Wonka-like world of the Capitol; to the Riefenstahl-esque propaganda-pageantry of the opening of the Games.

--I like how Katniss’ enemy was humanized at the end. We actually feel sorry for him. He was created by the Capitol.

--5 FACTS ABOUT "HUNGER GAMES" FOR THOSE WHO DIDN'T READ THE BOOKS: http://screenrant.com/hunger-games-movie-books-facts-kofi-160434/ (I just have to laugh at one of these facts: "The young actors can act, too...." I find it's just the other way around these days! I have to put a good word in for the adult actors because young adult/teen/child today usually act the adults--even the seasoned ones--under the table.)

--The mocking jay is not a real bird. :]

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NUNS IN RECENT MOVIES :]

"Three Stooges" (Larry David, far right)

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DILBERT: THE "DIGISEXUAL"

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LIFE OF ST. AUGUSTINE DVD

It will be called "Restless Heart" in English.

There's a great new DVD from Ignatius Press in the works! (I got to see a screener.) It's one of those big production Lives of the Saints that they've been producing in Italy lately. British cast. The whole life of Augustine with occasional narration from what else but "The Confessions"--um, hard to beat that source material.

Clever and profound dialogue. Startling facts from Auggie's life--that you may not know or may have forgotten--startlingly portrayed. St. Ambrose as we've never seen him before. Wait--we've NEVER seen Ambrose on screen!

This a great film if you like: philosophy, history, oratory, Church history, apologetics, BOOKS (you'll see), heresies (Arians! Donatists!), barbarians (Vandals!), St. Augustine, St. Monica, "Man for All Seasons," or Milan.

Ambrose: "Man doesn't find the truth, the Truth finds him."

Augustine: "I'm not worthy to be a priest."
Ambrose: "O, God's going to ask a lot more from you than that." :]

There are subtle themes about CIVILIZATION and the nature of civilization.

Sr. Anne Joan (@nunblogger) and I were totally laughing (at the jokes) and talking back to the screen the whole time. It's that engaging. It was like Mystery Science Theater 3000 for Church nerds and professional Catholics. (E.g., When Augustine tries to talk King Genseric of the Vandals out of sacking Hippo, we were catcalling: "Dude!  Don't do it! Your tribe will be forever associated with petty criminals!") Sr. Anne Joan and I agreed that today, our barbarians are from within. :[

This is a movie in which man's spiritual nature is successfully portrayed and God is a real character. This is a Catholic film that could only have been made by Catholics living in a Catholic country, methinks. Hollywood production standards, but not Hollywood sensibilities. It's coming from an insider's point of view. A NEW GENRE? The "CATHOLIC FILM"?

Monica figures in real big. And not just her pious praying for Augustine, but her motherly authority and personal Christian conviction. Also, Augustine's mistress and son.

This film is what we've been waiting for (always thought St. Augustine would make a good film)! Well done. Brava!

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